


Asahi's Terrible No Good Valentione's Day

by stepOnMeZenos



Category: Final Fantasy XIV
Genre: Asahi sas Brutus being a Terrible Person, Don't copy to another site, Gift Giving, Humour, Implied Zenos yae Galvus/Warrior of Light, M/M, Onesided Asahi sas Brutus/Zenos yae Galvus, The Author Being a Dick to Asahi sas Brutus, Unrequited Love, Valentione's Day (Final Fantasy XIV)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-14
Updated: 2019-02-14
Packaged: 2019-10-27 03:54:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,025
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17759294
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stepOnMeZenos/pseuds/stepOnMeZenos
Summary: Come heavens or hells, Asahi is going to present his beloved with the perfect gift.Things, however, don't quite go according to plan.





	Asahi's Terrible No Good Valentione's Day

**Author's Note:**

> When does this happen on the timeline, you ask?
> 
> ...LOOK, a distraction!

Valentione's Day. An Eorzean holiday celebrated in honour of some unimportant Ishgardian noblewoman during which one was to express their affection towards loved ones. It was a silly thing, of course, and hardly worth his time; what was it to him if Eorzean savages gifted each other chocolate? Ridiculous, Asahi thought as he fantasised about how Lord Zenos would react to his present, which he intended to give him on the fourteenth day of the second astral moon. Which had, of course, nothing to do with petty Eorzean customs at all. 

It would not do to gift him mere _chocolate bonbons_ , of course. Such pedestrian offerings would only serve to bore his beloved. No, it had to be something special, something _unique_ , something that would remind Lord Zenos of him whenever he looked at it. 

And that meant he had to procure the finest, the most exquisite, the _perfect_ sword. One that outclassed even the Ame-no-Habakiri—and how his blood boiled at the thought of Yotsuyu, that harlot who had somehow cheated her way into his Lord's graces because she had been the one lucky enough to present him with that blade. It wasn't fair! She didn't deserve Lord Zenos' attention! But it was fine. With the gift he intended to give him, it would all change for the—

"Um... Sir? Sir?"

Asahi snapped back into the present, to the clanging of hammers on steel and the smell of forges burning red hot. 

The smith's apprentice stood before him and gave him a puzzled look. Ugh. She looked positively dull. This was what he had come to Kugane for? A world famous smith and that was the kind of apprentice she employed?

Asahi forced a smile on his face, though he wanted nothing more than to snap at her for interrupting his thoughts. "Yes, what is it?" 

"Regarding your order... We ran into a problem." 

_If it turns out that you messed it up, I will personally see to it that you're sent straight to the seventh hell along with everyone you hold dear_ , Asahi thought.

"It can happen to anyone. Don't worry yourself overmuch," Asahi said. 

"Oh, that's a relief. I thought you would get angry, and..." The apprentice's gaze flickered to the soldier behind Asahi. Of course he would not venture out without an escort. He was, after all, a high-ranking Imperial officer. 

"I would _never_!" Asahi laughed. "But do tell me what the problem is. Mayhap I can help." Because a master smith could apparently not solve her _own_ problems. Disgraceful. He would see to it that they received due compensation if they put him through any difficulties. 

“We've run into some issues with the necessary materials—in short, our supplier's warehouse burned down and we haven't been able to source them from elsewhere...“ 

Asahi clapped his hands and imagined the apprentice's head between them. “Oh, you only needed to ask! I happen to have certain connections that I can use to help you procure what you need. What is it?“ 

Asahi's smile slipped ever so slightly when she told him. _Of course_ it would be the most expensive materials. Why would it be something that would be _easy_ to get. Perhaps he should see to it that that supplier's warehouse would burn down a second time once he'd rebuilt it, just for making him go through this. There was no helping it, however. Not if he wanted his present to be ready in time. It would cost him dearly, but he would do anything for his beloved Lord Zenos.

_Anything._

 

 

“What do you mean, _you don't have it?_ “

 

 

“This is,“ Asahi gasped in between swings, “ridiculous. Preposterous. _Unacceptable._ “ To think that he, a high-ranking Imperial official with potential to climb even higher, would find himself standing in the backwater area of a filthy steppe inhabited by filthy nomads, swinging a _bloody pickaxe_ trying to find that _bloody ore_ that apparently nobody else was able or willing to procure! Oh, they would be paying for their incompetence which had led to this, yes they would, while _he_ would be rewarded with Lord Zenos' attention… 

“Come now, surely it can't be that bad?“

The Ura who had agreed to be his guide for a hefty payment lowered his own pickaxe—curse him, he'd hardly even broken sweat, even though the sun was mercilessly beating down on them. Asahi would have a sunburn later on, he just knew it. Fortunately, there was plenty of time for it to subside before he would face his Lord again. 

“I would not _have_ to do this if it weren't for those incompetent...“ Asahi reached for his canteen and growled a curse when he found it empty. Surely he couldn't have drunk so much to have gone through its contents already.

The Ura had the gall to laugh at him. To _laugh_ at _him_. Filthy savage! The seething anger in Asahi's chest felt hot, even moreso than the sun, but he forced it down and didn't respond. He could endure this if it meant finishing his gift in time. He could endure anything for Zenos. 

“Why don't you see it as free exercise? You look like you could use some time sweating in the sun.“ The Ura picked his own axe up and swung it against the rocks with the same enthusiasm he'd displayed the entire time. 

Exercise! The nerve of this man!

 

 

Mammoths were big. They were a lot bigger than Asahi had expected. Why were they so big? 

He kept his reaction to himself, of course. The Dazkar had already made fun of him for wanting to join them on a hunt as a _man_ , those wretched women. He didn't need to give them even more ammunition.

Still, it was only prudent to bring them along to this place near a river running through the steppe. He did not, after all, know the area or its fauna very well. They would speed up the hunt for the leather he needed, and that was all that mattered. 

“Well, boy,“ one of the Dazkar said, “try not to get in the way too much. Wouldn't want you to get hurt before you can pay us.“ 

“I can handle myself, thank you _very_ much.“ Kami, but these people tested his patience. Were all Xaela this insufferable? Mayhap he should raise the possibility of annexing the steppe, just to teach them a lesson as to who their masters were.

The Dazkars' laughter after the mammoth nearly stepped on him rang in his ears long after they had departed and left him with his leather.

 

 

“The finest menuki, yes, yes,“ the Namazu cooed, holding out the crest on its… fin… paw… hand. Asahi hadn't laid a single finger on it, and yet he felt the need to wash his hands. Vile, dishonest creatures, the lot of them, but nobody else had been willing and able to procure what he needed to. He could have ordered soldiers to do it instead, but word would have gotten back to Lord Zenos, and that would have spoiled the surprise. 

“If it turns out that you're cheating me and this _isn't_ Kaien's menuki...“ 

“Eek!“ The Namazu shrank back and cowered. “No cheating, no cheating at all. I'm a reputable businessman, yes, yes.“ 

Asahi glared down on the beastman and picked up the menuki, taking care not to touch the skin in any way. Holding it up to the light, he examined it. It was of the right shape, the crest of a wave that he had seen on paintings, and it had the correct colour as well. For all he could tell, it was real. 

Much as it galled him, and much as he knew never to trust a Namazu, it seemed like he would have to do so in this case. With one last dirty look at it, he stalked off, holding on to his prize. A plain menuki gracing his gift's handle would not do. Only the most special crest was enough, and barely at that, and what was more special than the crest that had decorated the sword of Doma's former king? 

 

 

Once the Hyur had passed out of earshot, Gyodo giggled to himself. Such a fool! Paid half a fortune for cheap trinkets Gyodo usually sold to tourists on the cheap. Kaien's menuki? Really? It was long gone, looted from the battlefield or maybe just lost, and that Imperial moron had bought his claims of being able to find it—the _only_ one who could, as well—hook, line and sinker. Who exactly had promoted him to his position? Gyodo had a bridge or two to sell that person as well.

 

 

Lord Zenos turned the gleaming sword over in his hands and examined it. His face—his beautiful, magnificent, _perfect_ face—betrayed no emotion, but Asahi knew he liked his gift. He just knew. There was no way his prince wouldn't. It was a gorgeous work. For all her incompetence, the smith had delivered on her promises. The blade fit so very well into Doma Castle's interior, and would look even more beautiful at his Lord's side, polished to perfection as it was and with an edge as razor-sharp as the great masterpieces. 

Any moment now, Lord Zenos would look up and thank him for his tribute in earnest. Tell him that he had scarcely seen such exquisite work, that it far eclipsed the trash Yotsuyu had bothered him with, that he was a better subordinate than _she_ could ever be—

“It's adequate, I suppose,“ Zenos said.

Whatever else he had meant to say—and surely there would have been more—was cut off by the door creaking open and a lowly soldier hurrying inside. He was clutching a bloodstained sword, for some reason. Asahi refrained from admonishing him. He _deserved_ it, interrupting his prince like this, but Lord Zenos would surely put him in his place.

The soldier saluted sloppily. “Mylord, I have an, er, message from the Warrior of Light!“

Asahi's gift clattered to the floor as Zenos rose to his feet. “Speak.“ 

“He gave me this sword and told me he—he took out an entire patrol with this 'piece of metal garbage', and challenged you to...“ The soldier swallowed.

“I told you to _speak_.“ 

“Y-yes Mylord!“ The soldier saluted again. “He told me to tell you that you should come kill him with this!“

“Did he now,“ Zenos said softly. He held out a hand and, after the soldier handed him the sword hilt-first, gave it an experimental swing. It looked awkward to Asahi. The blade was too short to match his lord's stature, and it was so… plain. There were no adornments to be seen, and in fact it looked to be in a rather poor state. There were nicks all over the edge. Such trash was not fit to be touched by his prince. How _dare_ this filthy rat send it to him? 

“Far be it for me to back down from a challenge like this! I shall seek him out at once.“ Zenos' eyes positively _gleamed_ in a way Asahi had never seen before. He strode past the soldier towards the door with wide arching steps without ever looking back. A ray of light shining through the window made his hair glow in a warm gold, akin to the finest jewellery crafted by the most accomplished master goldsmiths. Then he left the room, and a moment later even the sound of his footsteps vanished. 

“Um… Praefectus?“ 

“Get out.“ 

“Wh—“

“ _Get out_ , you impertinent, miserable, disgraceful _blight_ on the face of the Empire!“

The soldier fled without even saluting.

Asahi picked up the sword that lay discarded on the ground. One day. One day, Lord Zenos would discard that gutter rat known as the Warrior of Light and see who truly loved him. He would not get away with commanding his Lord's attention forever, when he had no right to it! Zero. None whatsoever. He was naught but a rundown filthy savage who wasn't _worthy_ of Lord Zenos!

 

 

The soldiers standing watch outside the room politely pretended not to hear the wails coming from inside.


End file.
